Responding to God's Call/Carmelite Sister Therese of Holy Family

Intermountain Catholic

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By Carmelite Sister Therese of Holy Family

Special to the Intermountain Catholic

Editor’s note: This is one in a series of personal vocation stories from seminarians, religious women, deacons and priests in the Diocese of Salt Lake City. 

“Is there life after death?” I kept asking myself that question while looking at my sister’s dead body lying there. I was 12 then and was facing death for the first time. I loved my sister so much that her passing completely shut down my soul. Tears did not calm me; love from family could not comfort me, but thanks be to God my father insisted that I went with him to daily Mass. It was the Mass that brought life back to me, pulled me out of my fear and depression and gave me the desire to work for something that would last forever.  Yes, I would work for God, and God alone would I serve.

God works in mysterious ways.  God never “spoke” to tell me that He wanted me to be a nun or what religious order I should enter, but He surely never left me as I struggled through during those years to figure out where I should go. 

During my last year in high school and first year in college, I sincerely believed that God wanted me to be a missionary sister; thus, I volunteered with a lot of different organizations.  However, the more I did, the more I wanted to do more. Something was still missing; peace was not there in my heart. I wanted to help the whole world. But how? The truth was, after all of my “doings,” my soul just yearned to be quiet with our Lord. After many hours of quiet prayer and Masses, our loving, merciful God instilled in my heart the desire for Carmel, the answer that I had been searching for. I can’t do more, but I can certainly pray for the whole world through a loving life of prayer and union with Him. Praise God I have found my vocation. Peace, once again, has taken possession of my heart and soul, and it’s purely a gift from God.

It’s been 18 years since I left home to enter Carmel. It’s been the most grace-filled 18 years. There is no word to describe the intense gratitude I have for God. It’s such a blessing and honor to be in Carmel. I’m so unworthy to be here; yet our merciful God has chosen me. I pray that I persevere to the end. May my life be one of thanksgiving to Him. I’m eternally grateful for the prayers my family and friends have offered for me on my behalf.

The little sacrifices I have made to follow God are nothing compared to the profound peace I have received from Him. Hold tight to our blind faith.  Embrace the Holy Eucharist.  God will never leave us if we humbly seek Him with our loving heart.

Yes, there is eternal life after death, but I don’t earn it by my own merit, only through God’s mercy. Heaven is not far away. Indeed, heaven could be right here, in Carmel, and in our souls.

Editor’s note: St. Mary Parish will sponsor 40 Hours of Adoration for Vocations from Thursday, May 10 to Saturday, May 12, at the church, 4050 South 3900 West, West Haven. For information or to sign up to adore at a particular hour, call 801-621-7961 weekdays between 8:30 a.m. and noon.